How to Balance Motherhood & Career [Tips for New & Current Moms]
Well Hello There!
Welcome back to the new and improved CJT Online! Honestly, it's been some time since my last, real blog post. I mean, life, right? It happens! So, all we can do is go through the motions. But, I hope you have made yourself acquainted with our new digs. As I transform, so will this space and the content that is shared on this platform. Now, are you ready to get into today's, I know I am!
Let's talk about one of the things that I get the MOST questions about ...
Yup! That's right, motherhood. Now that most of my friends and fellow tribe members are either pregnant or giving birth for the very first time, it seems like I am the go-to source for advice about children and motherhood. I am always tickled when I check my Instagram inbox or text messages and many of the women that I know are always curious about how I balance motherhood and my career. Sometimes I reply with a crying-face emoji, "Sis, by the grace of God and good boxed wine." Most days, I am totally winging it, while other days I implement a clear mom-strategy to promote tranquility and structure in my home. So, the tips that I will share with you today were either Googled and then implemented, scary realizations or simple, old-school advice from my precious Auntie Kay. Now, is this the end all be all, absolutely not! So I encourage you to take what you see here and make it work for you.
HOW I BALANCE MOTHERHOOD & WORK
Cross My Fingers & Pray It All Works Out
Sis, I am literally winging it. I have been a mother of one for four years and then poof, voilà, I become, a mother of two rugrats. With four years with one baby to now juggling two little ones with only two months under my belt ... I am still trying to figure out how this flow should pan out. Before you put too many priorities on yourself, just remember you are trying and that's the best thing (and sometimes the only thing) you can do.
I Have Taught Myself That I Am Not the Perfect Woman or Mother ...
But one woman on a mission to instill happiness and togetherness under my roof. Social media can be the most amazing thing or the evilest thing on this planet. I don't care what it is ... social media has the power to make us believe that the folks we follow are perfect and have everything managed and put together. Now, this couldn't be further from the truth. Every day, we share and see pieces of what we want to share with the world. It is a very small piece of who we are on a day-to-day basis. Motherhood is teaching me that I am going to mess up, sometimes royally. But, my kids have no idea whether my method is right, wrong or perfect. So, as they grow up, so will we. Stop putting so much pressure on yourself when things go far left on how you may have planned them. Strive for flexibility and not perfection. Trust me sis, you will thank yourself a million times over. Remember, no matter the outcome, our children only see "superwoman" in front of them. We can only succeed and strike balance if are patient, open to learning, flexible and 100% ok with getting things wrong. We are human, not programmable robots.
Instead of Sacrificing Make Accommodations
Listen, our kids could care less about our work schedules or our personal meetings. As annoying as it could be, I always look on the brighter side, "Shoot, I can save money on a sitter if I just take them along." I have developed a new mantra, "If my kids can't go, to hell with it." Now, I am all for self-care and healthy time apart for parents and their kiddos, but I want my kids around me as much as I can, being that I am back at work and do not get to see them as often as I want. So, instead of being depressed on where they may not be able to go, do a little research and find out the perfect places that are family and kiddo friendly. Think of clever ways that you and your little ones can get to where you want and need to be. For instance, no matter if I am washing clothes or even meeting up with a friend, I snap on my baby carrier and make it happen. I have a toddler that is super independent and into technology and then my small newborn who just wants to be where his mommy is. So, one gets my phone and the other is carried in the front of my body. Done and done. I can do whatever I need to, once I make the proper accommodations for my kids.
Last and Most Important: Just Let It Go And Try Again
Who says that you have to get it right on the first try. It's like crying over spilled breast milk. Am I going to keep crying or clean up the spill and pump some more milk and keep it moving? It is so very important that we are gentle and kind to ourselves. The world beats us up more than enough, so now it's time to tend to the most important flower in the garden of life ... ourselves.